As May draws closer, many students across the college have been looking for quick ways to get shredded in time for the exams. ‘The RDS is unforgiving,’ said one student. ‘You can hide all you want during the semester, but if you’re not built by the exams, people will know.’

Across the campus, attitudes towards the upcoming exam period varied. ‘I’m feeling good about the exams,’ said one student. ‘I’ve been working out a lot and my mum bought me some tight-fitting shirts to wear during the exams.’

Another was similarly optimistic, ‘I’m not worried about the exams. I’ve been pulling a lot of late nights lately. And since I got hold of some Adderall, my workout schedule has really started to come together’. However, not all students responded so positively. ‘I did pretty badly at the exams last year – one of the invigilators told me I was the least muscular in my row,’ a student said.

‘So now I’m pretty nervous about this year. I screwed up by trying to cram my entire workout into the night before the exams’ they went on. ‘Now I know that to get the results, you need to be lifting from day one of the semester’.


Karl O’Reilly Turbine Editor